When Words Fly

Ocean waters at Sunset captured by my dad Wes Corbett

The words they flew like cormorants diving into the deep ocean waters. They came out with intensity ready to do battle for their livelihood. But these words unlike the cormorants weren't seeking their next meal they were seeking protection. They were doing battle for me...they were letting everyone know that I didn't want to be hurt and that I wasn't going to just let them walk over me. How often do our words go to battle for us? Or perhaps your words don't do battle but it's your silence that speaks volumes. In the midst of the silence the walls are being built brick by brick by brick until all that can be seen is the mortar between the lines and the understanding that there once was a relationship that stood there. Or perhaps you communicate in code. What you want you don't speak directly...you just hint at it hoping the other person will pick up on it. But what you end up with is confusion and resentment on both sides.You see relationships and communication are a funny thing. It's easier to let it go, to let the words fly, to let the silence build, and to let the innuendos dance. It's easier to build barriers when communication breaks down then it is to be honest, humble, kind, and direct. Yet, it's the easy way that becomes the broken way. It breaks relationships, it breaks spirits, it breaks hearts.

I am learning this lesson about words...learning about their power and their importance. How we can use our words for good. How we can learn to communicate in a healthy way to express what is going on within us. I am also learning how if we don't seek change we keep repeating over and over the same dance with our words...dancing around issues, dancing our words over others pounding them down, or refusing to let our words dance and by doing so stifling the relationships God has intended. James chapter 3 speaks often about the tongue and it's uncontrollable nature. He sums up his point on the tongue with these words "Who is wise and understanding among you? Let them show it by their good life, by deeds done in the humility that comes from wisdom." (James 3:13 NIV) Part of the key to controlling our words is found in wisdom done in humility. Dr. Constable in his commentary notes puts understanding wisdom this way, "One of the marks of wisdom is gentleness, meekness, humility. The Greek word prauteti (“gentleness”) occurs in non-biblical literature to describe a horse that someone had broken and had trained to submit to a bridle. It pictures strength under control, specifically the Holy Spirit’s control. The evidence of this attitude is a deliberate placing of oneself under divine authority. The only way to control the tongue is to place one’s mind deliberately under the authority of God and to let Him control it (have His way with it; cf.Matt. 11:27; 2 Cor. 10:1)."

We must deliberately put our minds under God's control and allow the Holy Spirit to change us from the inside out. We need to allow him to chisel away at the repeating patterns of our tongues. We need to evaluate our patterns of communication for what they are and place them at His feet and seek grace. We must ask of ourselves: When do I do this? Why am I doing this? What about this situation is causing me to react in this way.? Am I seeking protection? Am I feeling unloved? Do I do this because my family does this? We must ask ourselves introspective questions under the scope of His word and let His graceful truth transform our hearts and in so doing our future behavior. Honest and humble communication isn't easy but it is good. It leads to good things for us and those around us. It can change the course of our life and the lives of those around us. 

We can become instruments of healing and bestow grace with our words. We can see discord and remain present instead of running away with our mouths or with our hearts. We can face conflict knowing we can speak in a way that is honoring to God, ourselves and the other person(s). Just bring it to Him...bring it all to him...the pain, the ugliness, the tongue of fire. Let Him be in control and what comes forth will be a thing of beauty...a masterpiece. No longer controlled by the tongue but instead controlled by the Spirit. Oh and when you mess up, when you find yourself in the dance again...press pause on the music and look again at what's going on within and share it with Him. Every misstep is a chance to receive grace and to let him chisel some more. I am walking down this road myself...so you aren't walking alone.  Don't be surprised if you see some dust from the chiseling resting on my shoulders. It's His glory at work. We are all masterpieces in progress. Who's joining me?